A handmaid of the Lord

Behold the handmaid of the Lord: Be it done unto me according to Thy word. These are the thoughts and experiences of my journey toward being a handmaid with Mary as my example.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Charlie - Mr. Wonderful

I had the most horrifying dream last night that Charlie was driving home from work and got hit by a semi on FM-2978 and died instantly. It was one of those dreams where it seemed so real that I was relieved to wake up. It's been bothering me all day long and I just can't shake it. I was so devistated and hysterical...I can't imagine loving anyone in the world like I love him. And it was worse that he wasn't there when I got up (he has to leave at 5 AM every day this week for Junior High day camp). I just need to let go of it. I hate that kind of stuff.
I hope that we still have years and years together. The other day I made a comment to him about how in "25 years...," and then I thought WOAH 25 YEARS?! lol I can't imagine being with someone for that long...just because I have no gague of what 25 years is, I'm only 23 years old after all and out of those 23 years, I only remember probably 15 at most lol. Next month, we'll have been together for 8 years (3 of which we'll have been married). We met when we were in high school at a summer time NET retreat. I remember the moment I first saw him. He's 6'1"ish and the door frame was low, I remember him ducking under the door frame, looking up, and then I saw his amazing blue eyes. It certainly wasn't love at first sight, because I don't believe in that. But something stirred within my soul, something I couldn't put my finger on. We didn't meet eachother for 2 more days (there were a lot of people there and we each had our own friends we were with), but we had noticed each other. He is my best friend and the greatest blessing of my life - I thank God all the time for putting such an amazing man in my life. He's such a loving father, a hard worker, a faithful and faith-filled man; he's got amazing integrity, a servant's spirit, and he is so strong. Obviously I can't begin to name every little thing about him that I love and adore but, I just wanted to take a moment to reflect after last night. I never want to take him for granted. He's wonderful.


At 6/05/2006 10:11 PM, Anonymous Ashley said...

Being in love is the greatest!

At 6/05/2006 11:14 PM, Anonymous angie said...

How very sweet.

At 6/06/2006 4:40 PM, Blogger anchor_deep said...

I stumbled on your blog, while looking up something completly different... any way, you mentioned that you are a handmaiden of the lord, faith filled, etc... so can I give you a bit of advice. Dreams can be very disturbing and can affect how we feel after we have them.. You have had a pretty positive reaction to your dream, thinking about how grateful you are to have your loved one.. that's good, but sometimes the enemy of our faith can attack our peace through our dreams and cause us to worry and fear. But remember he is a liar and the author of all lies. He also comes to steal, kill and destroy. Now because you have faith, you don't have to allow him to dictate to your emotions. When you have distrubing dreams, immediately when you wake up pray about it and plead the blood of Jesus over your home and loved ones and all you have. Then remember that God is in control and will keep you in perfect peace. Determine immediately that as soon as worrisome thoughts come to your mind or fears attacks your emotions that you will pray and continue to pray for the person you are concerned for. Satan hates us to pray. He soon realizes that fear turns us to prayer and he will stop attacking you that way. The kingdom of God is Righteosness, Peace and Joy. If anything causes one of these to leave you, then you need to immediately pray and find out what is causing the problem. Many times it is only something Satan is trying to torment us with. Well just a thought. Hope you don't mind this from a stranger, but you seem truly happy and in love and seeking God, so I hope it helps.

At 6/06/2006 9:39 PM, Anonymous angie said...

I ment to also comment that that is a horrible dream. I'm sorry that it stayed with you like that. :(
Love you girlie.

At 6/08/2006 6:51 AM, Anonymous Angela said...

I remember that retreat! That seems SO LONG AGO...but I feel like I remember everything from it. It was amazing.


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